I once heard someone say that “people die but love does not”. My thought at the time was that those were some of the most truthful words ever spoken.
Love is the most powerful emotion there is. I believe that love is the most powerful emotion that people can choose to feel. It may even be that in some cases, its not a choice. It is, or can be, the most powerful force we have the pleasure to experience in our lives. I know, it sounds like some cheesy feel good movie title. But, the thing is though, I would not have survived my heart attack, without the power of love. Even as I was drifting away from this existence, I could feel the love that my husband and I had for each other pulling me back. Pulling me back from this peaceful, pain free and tranquil place I was drifting off too. I could feel his presence there beside my lifeless body, trying to find the words to say good bye. When it would seem that revival efforts lasting a little over 35 minutes would not be successful. Then, as the ER doctor calling the procedures asked for one last check for a pulse….
It must have been at this moment, that I remember thinking to myself, what was I doing, I can’t leave yet. Who would look after my loved ones? I can’t go to this place. I’m not ready to leave them on their own. Flashes of my husband and our animal family at the home we had built together kept running through my mind, with overwhelming force. They needed me! I needed them! So, love brought me back from this place where there was no pain. It was the most comfortable place that I had ever been. It was like I was resting on the softest, most comfortable bed that had ever been built. There was no pain or pressure on my body. My soul felt like I was home. I was finally where I belonged. But, my mind could not rest. Something or someone was telling me that I needed to go back. Back to my loved ones. Back to my home. There was a force pulling me back to my loved ones. There could not be complete and lasting bliss in this new existence yet if I was to stay. My time for that long peaceful sleep had not yet come.
Though it looked like I was dying, my Love was not…
With love always,
Tanya Jean